As we uncover the secrets to have a happy marriage from a few of our close friends, we find out that the ‘secrets’ are not really secrets. They are certain issues that you simply need to be aware of. Some of them are behavioral traits, some are personality traits while some are just plain old common sense. Let’s allow some of our well experienced friends to speak in this matter.
1. Allow your partner to screw up
‘You may not have a happy marriage by pinning down your partner for every fault of his. But if you allow room for mistakes and screw ups, your partner will realize that you are learning to let go of his shortcomings’ says Rebecca, 32. She tells about an incident when her husband Rob, forgot their anniversary. Instead of reacting wildly, she thought ‘Does he have too many problems at work? Is he stressed out with a busy schedule?’, ‘Does he have financial problems?’ Thinking like Rebecca will foster a loving relationship between you and your husband and is a sure shot way to have a happy marriage.
2. Talk openly with your partner
‘Having open communication lines is absolutely critical’ says Ruby, 25. We can’t agree more. Have you ever let go of a certain argument just because you felt it was not worth arguing? Do you suppress your emotions thinking that you might hurt your relationship with your husband? We suggest that you don’t, because those suppressed emotions can later blast off like a pressure cooker. To have a happy marriage, you must talk freely with your husband.
3. Respect your partner and his needs
Janice, 44, uses the word ‘respect’ in a certain context here. ‘To have a happy marriage, don’t just fulfill your partner’s needs. Respect them too’ she advices. ‘And this goes both ways. He should respect your needs as well. This will straighten out a lot of other problems automatically and will allow you to have a happy marriage’.
4. Behave like a romantic teen
This advice may sound funny to you but we think that a little bit of teeny romance in a marriage can go a long way in improving the bond between partners. Show excitement when your husband comes home from work, tell him to take you out on a date and reignite the romantic teen inside both of you to have a happy marriage.
5. Be honest
Lies, even white lies can come back to haunt you, missy. So be truthful and honest to your husband and expect the same level of honesty in return. ‘The secret to have a happy marriage does not lie in how well you can manipulate or lie to solve a misunderstanding with your partner. It lies in your ability to solve a misunderstanding with the truth’ says Martha, 39. She has learnt some lessons really well, it seems!
6. Plan your life with your husband
The word ‘planning’ goes hand in hand with the success of any relationship, partnership or even business. Wouldn’t you like to take stock of where your marriage is heading every few years? ‘To have a happy marriage, my husband and I sit down every fortnight to set out our emotional, physical and financial goals’ says Diva, 31. Do you know why she suggests this? Because when you will plan your future with your partner, both will feel more attached to the magical journey of marriage. Diva goes one step ahead to suggest that you should note down your goals and revisit them after every year or two to see how you are going.
Our friends have suggested some great ways of having a happy marriage. To have a happy marriage, you don’t need a big house, a fancy car and a fat bank balance. Of course, these things do come in handy, but the real secrets to have a happy marriage are based on how well you can accommodate and adjust with your partner. Put into practice our great tips to rejuvenate your marriage.
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